B-zy Me...

One week old in a B-school and i am still clueless about what i want to get out of this MBA programme. And it is precisely this very fact that's giving me sleep-less nights. Nothing else could be more unnerving than to realise that you do not have a clear view about your future, especially when most (well, almost all) have their minds made up and hearts set upon their chosen paths.

One of our very dynamic marketing professors' kind advice to all of us was - decide which subjects are gonna be your forte for the rest of the two years here and then go for the kill. In the rest 15 or so just keep afloat (yeah.. we have 18 subjects !!!). But what if you don't know what you want ?

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The OBL went perfectly fine. All complete with the first rain showers of the season. Though our "OBL" started a night before we managed to catch up with the class 6 hours later. Well, as someone said 'Friends, family and health come foremost. Everything else follows'.

Made lotsa crazy crazy friends and I guess it's because of programmes like these that u start feeling belonged; the warmth; the sense of oneness. The Bonfire rocked, skit went off well but the highlight of the day would be the fire alarm that went off in the middle of the night, followed by the mad frenzy of scambling outside, leaving all your belongings behind to perish in the imaginary fire that was supposedly raging around us, and building dusty tents so that we could stay in there. Weird.... but fun.

Next morning saw me gettin up at 5 for the first trek of my life. Gettin ready to conquer the Singhgad. A few observations:

1. There is nothing more powerful than the human mind. Stress, anticipation or the idea of giving up lies in the mind. If your mind loses it your gone....
2. Take each stone as it comes without thinkin of the mountain top.
3. Learn to find your steps through the seemingly uneven stones. Its surprising how they seem to appear once you have made up your mind to see them.
4. Take small steps as per your capacity. Its absolutely worthless to think of how fast/slow others are. So it always help to compete.
5. Carry lots of water but dont think of drinking it all at once.

That was a lot of gyan and all this enlightenment was attained as i climbed to the top. Maybe heights are conducive to contemplation. Maybe that's the reason why sages preferred solitude at great heights.

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Life here is weird. Sometimes there is such tremendous workload , that you are struggling to stay alive. At other times there seems such a void, you wanna scream your lungs out for work.

It's like the lull before the storm, and it's precisely this that makes it more scary. Atleast when the storm's raging you know that soon this would pass. But when you are going through a relaxed spell you never know when it's gonna hit you. You wouldn't even know what hit you. And it's nerve-wracking. Especially in the face of a dismal performance at a surprise class tests in one of my weakest subjects (Not weak really.. just new and unaccustomed... that's it). This cannot and should not be repeated. I sincerely hope. But where's the stress to keep me on my toes ?

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Switched to aerobics since the past coupla days. Its rejuvenating, stimulating and ofcourse tiring. But it feels awesome when you are planning to bunk the class the next morning. Well, planning as yet..... let's see what my conscience has to say about it tomorrow.....

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Cmon gal... buck up.....

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Sometimes i wonder....... Why do we have to sleep at night ????